portal to love

The next day I did a phone session with Micheline. I had done shamanic work with her long before, but hadn’t connected with her in years; now I was able to, thanks to a gift from my friend Margit. I told Micheline about the transformation of the day before, and wasn’t sure that we could possibly do any deeper healing than I had already done.Micheline felt that I now needed to completely step into my new energy body.

In order to do this, we first needed to clear out both my own identification with “stage IV cancer,” which was holding me down and keeping me sick, and the energy of worry that people who loved me were inadvertently sending.

She looked to see who was available to help clear the energy of worry, and there was my old friend, Green Tara. Green Tara is a very active form of Tara, Tara of Action, who easily transmutes obstacles. She is pictured about to rise from a seated position, showing her energy of “going forth.”

She conveys the green ray, a ray of healing and deep love. Micheline brought my awareness to Green Tara who was there streaming the green ray, clearing out the energy of worry carried by loved ones.

Then she sensed that there was an emotional energy that was keeping me sick. She saw a picture of me holding up each of my hands and flinging my energy between the extremes that each hand held: one hand being the “worst case scenario” of complete sickness, and other hand being complete paradise. She asked me to slowly bring my hands together over my heart so that I could live in a non-dual energy that encompassed everything.

And then she asked me to release myself from this body and all of my identity as a person with “stage IV cancer,” to let go, and as I did, to let my body slump over. As I did this, she saw in front of me the “portal” to the new me. She asked who would accompany me through this portal, and there arrived the rose-pink light that has so often been with me in this journey. As I stepped through the portal I stepped into my new being; the energy of complete love. In this body I no longer needed to run around and prostrate myself in the name of “service;” I simply needed to be love.

As I stepped into this body, a gold light appeared to show my cells perfect programming.


-golden light entering my cells from my collage/painting

As this session finished, I knew that I was now in the healing stream. I knew that my cells would follow the direction of my spirit, and that gradually my body would heal.

A few days later, on the lunar new year, I made this collage/painting about my transformation in the year of the horse. The images from the last two posts are from it. The central image is White Tara, the goddess of healing illness, as painted by Carmen Mensink.

IMG_0795Now stop, close your eyes, feel in yourself feel the rose-pink light of complete love. I am this love, you are this love, all that we are that is beyond I-you is this love. Go forth as this love.


3 thoughts on “portal to love

  1. You have found many wonderful and talented guides and healers, but really it is you that done the guiding and the healing. By conducting yourself to these inner places, by answering to the call you hear without even knowing where it will lead, by opening yourself to whatever comes, you have stepped into a most radiant and timeless you. You are deeply gorgeous. If I could I would send you a cascade of twinkly stars to fall over you and twirl in. LOVE from me to you, XB

  2. Beth,
    There is not enough room on the Internet to tell you how meeting you changed the entire course if my life, or maybe that I found you right when I needed too. There are not many times in life where something shows you the exact path that led you to where you are now. This has happened a few times for me in the last year. I realized that all the pain that had me seek out an alternative treatment led me to you. And how funny that it was at the zoo. After my experience with coworkers and you I began to really delve into alternative ways, non western med, green practices, natural wellness. It led me to my next job at chiro/nutritionist. This led me to more information and new friends that helped to shape what I know now. And further and further down the rabbit hole I am now surrounded by people who are like minded and supportive. Even though I have days of sadness, on the days where everything is so crystal clear where I can be thankful for the people in my life that brought to where I am now, are so valued. I want you to know that I wept for you st the news of this new cancer news. Of all people I know, I know that you are so strong and your spirit will bring you to where you need to be. I want you to know that you helped to change my life and start me on a path of knowledge I never new I could find. That path has benifited everyone who knows me and accepts any information I can pass their way. I’ve never met anyone like you and my wish for you is sheer joy and happiness wherever you can find it.
    Lots of love to you!!

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